The frustration of it all.

There are times when I understand why some animals in the wild eat their young. I believe it is to save their own lives or at least preserve their sanity. Now, I would never advocate or actually consider harming my children. However, there are days when I wonder exactly what cruel joke is being played on me by being their mother. The problem lies with my two oldest sons. They are 20 and 15 respectively. They drive me up the wall. One of them loses everything of value that he is given, but has every school assignment and notebook since the 5th grade. Since 7th grade, he has lost 5 calculators totaling $600.00. Add to that, mp3 players, countless hats and gloves and probably a few other things he hasn't told me about. I think the most frustrating thing is that it seems like he doesn't care. He takes a very nonchalant approach to the items he loses. Probably because he figures they will all be replaced. The latest thing he lost was a really nice hat that my husband just bought him. He lost it and never bothered to mention it. I just happened to ask him if he had his hat and he said yes. My mommy radar went off and I said, "you lost the hat didn't you?" I was faced with the blank "deer in the headlights"stare that I have seen so many times. I was so angry that I actually wanted to cry. Not sure why I reacted that way to the loss of a hat.  I think it is because I have finally reached the breaking point.  Now, on to my 20 year old. *sigh*. He is just in that, "grown without having your own" stage. I don't even have the strength to begin writing about him right now.  He acts as if is a bachelor in a house of 6.  Don't get me wrong, they are beautiful young men, but they just seem so clueless at times. I still have to tell them to wash their clothes, take out the garbage, wash the dishes, etc...I really fear for their future. At this rate, they better marry women who want grown children. I still have hope that one day they will wake up with responsibility and maturity. At this rate, the younger two will move out of the house before they do. I must admit I probably have something to do with the way that they are. I was very attentive and always there for them no matter what, cooking, cleaning, help with homework. I thought that this was what I was supposed to do. If only I had known, I would have spent much more time away from home allowing for them to fend for themselves. Maybe that would have taught them a lesson. Probably not. In fact from what I hear, the behavior of my oldest two sons seems to be an epidemic. There are scores of parents out there just like myself and my husband standing in the middle of a room scratching and shaking their heads wondering where it all went awry. Is there hope for us? I don't know. Right now, all we can do is wait for them to move out, have jobs, bills, homes and families of their own so we can sit back with sly grins on our faces...... if we survive that long.