I shall not saddle you with any sad words today. Just some of my Saturday morning thoughts
The seasons have changed in my part of the world. The night comes quicker and the cooler temps have joined it. The hot flash savior weather is how I now describe it. Summer was weird. No outside cookouts in the park. No zoo trips. No festivals or anything of the sort. Time was spent in the backyard, tending the garden and as always for me, running away from the giant grasshoppers and locusts that take up residency amongst my green beans and bell peppers. The garden struggled from the start because of a very cool Spring and a super wet July. A few times we thought nothing would flourish. But, it found a way and blessed us for another year. I spent a lot of this Summer in a very reflective mood. Sometimes that was good, other times not so good. Some of my happiest days were when my husband and sons would gather in the backyard after the sun had gone down, We would stare up at the sky and marvel at the moon and the stars. We saw our first comet and we talked about how we all hoped to visit a dark sky park one day. I'm glad my sons see the beauty in nature. It warms my heart to see them get excited about birds and see them take pictures of flowers and caterpillars. At least I was able to pass that down to them.
My thoughts change for a moment.
I promised myself I would keep things light today. Because if I wrote all that's been going on in my mind lately......
Anyway, did I ever tell you that I have a beautiful granddaughter? She is 8 months old. My son named her after my daughter who passed away in infancy. Saying my daughter's name again is strange. It brings up so many many emotions. None I care to delve into right now. I haven't met my granddaughter yet in person because of the covid-19 situation, but we do video chat a few times a week. I place my hand on the screen of my tablet and trace the outline of her face with my finger. I can only wonder what her skin feels like and what she smells like. Sadness tries to creep in, but her beautiful smile pushes it all away.
I glance out my window and I can see the cold. The sky is gray with just a hint of blue peeking through. The leaves on the trees sway vigorously in the chilly 45° air. I'm reminded that I haven't had my cup of hot tea yet. The birds and squirrels are stuffing their mouths with the seeds from our feeder. The Summer birds have gone. Autumn migration brings new visitors. Or maybe they've been here before and remembered where the food was. A lone red male cardinal sits on the electrical lines that run endlessly up and down our alley. Maybe he is waiting for his turn to grab some food.
I rest my head in my hands for a moment to try and think of anything else I would like to say. There's a lot. But, again I'm being cautious with my words.
Today the fear and anxiety won't cripple me.
Today I will try to leave the house alone and go somewhere(ANYWHERE)
Today I will
Today I
Today
Today is all we have, so I will make it count.
Probably by cooking something for my guys because that's me and cooking makes me happy.
I think to myself, WOW! This blog has changed a million times over the years. I wonder if anyone ever reads it? And if they do, what do they think?
May you be surrounded in the white light of Love, Peace, and Divine protection
"There is no such thing in anyone's life
as an unimportant day."
Alexander Woollcott
